I must see

A poem by Achuthan Panikath

Sun Jul 05 2026

There's fire all over me.
I close my eyes and the light knocks gently on my lids
Beckoning me to see.

I must see.
The sunset past that hill into the sea.
I must see the death of this star into the night.
But I cannot slither without setting fire to these green untouched lands.
If I awaken from this slumber, I may have to kill those that crave no end.
I will be shunned, ridiculed, and hated.
I will no longer be understood.

But I must see.
I break these shackles and I begin to climb.
I shut my ears to the shrieks of terror.
It is time to see.
I move with deadly grace.
I move with life ahead and dead skin behind.
The world is not left the same where I once went.
I am no longer sorry, for I must know.

The melodies of this universe draw me towards them but I,
I don't even sing for those that come after.
I am no longer afraid to see.
I simply slither further up.
As the light that came knocking melted into the abundance of life.
As I fully unravel and reach the precipice,
The quietness whispers something I may have always known:
I am meant to be my own light this dark night.

The universe will always be the same, but not I.
I have now killed to be alive.
I must exist in that heaviness,
Because I had to witness to understand,
I sacrificed ever being understood.